Funny Exam Quotes
The more studying you did for the exam, the less sure you are as to which answer they want.
80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read.
Every instructor assumes that you have nothing else to do except study for that instructor’s course.
The night before the English History mid-term, your biology instructor will assign 200 pages on planaria.
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
If you are given a take-home exam, you will forget where you live.
Bryn Mawr had done what a four-year dose of liberal education was designed to do: unfit her for eighty per cent of useful work of the world.
To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you too may one day be president of the United States.
You can lead a boy to college but you can’t make him think.
Of course there’s a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don’t take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates….
Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it’s in Hamburger Technology.
When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important will be illegible. College isn’t the place to go for ideas.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of another boy. (Clown Prince of American Humor, 1975)
They are so afraid we shall break down, and you know the reputation of the college is at stake, for the question is, can girls get a college degree without injuring their health.
Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges.
A college is a place where pebbles are polished and diamonds dimmed.
Aakanksha Said,
April 11, 2008 @ 2:06 am
HAHA – so funny!
Malik Said,
April 27, 2008 @ 6:57 am
VerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrY FunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnY!
Specially 80% of the final exam
Sara Said,
July 7, 2008 @ 6:42 pm
really funny….
i liked those…..
lovelydarling Said,
July 30, 2008 @ 3:21 am
ha ha ha
awesome!
saurabh Said,
August 28, 2008 @ 10:51 am
nice quotes
aneez Said,
August 28, 2008 @ 12:37 pm
really nice amazing intresting cant stop laughing thanks
Shreya Said,
September 10, 2008 @ 6:39 pm
Good collection…hilarious.
ritesh Said,
September 19, 2008 @ 6:14 pm
mast likha!!!!!!!
p00nam Said,
October 2, 2008 @ 8:38 pm
pretty true n realistic
sahil Said,
November 18, 2008 @ 1:45 pm
they are awesome funny quotes that really suites aur college
abhey Said,
November 24, 2008 @ 12:56 pm
all quotes rock!!!awesome!!!!
reality!!!haaaaaaaaaaah haaaaaaaah
anuuuuuuuuu...... Said,
December 8, 2008 @ 1:29 pm
ha ha ha ha ha………………it was really very funny ………..just think if they were facts
Shavya Said,
December 11, 2008 @ 10:51 am
i must say…u can actually connect with these…
awesome…
elly Said,
December 15, 2008 @ 6:50 am
hahahaha.. hilarious.. the first and the second ones i couldnt agree more.. haha
michele Said,
December 17, 2008 @ 2:45 pm
considering im in school right now and about to take an exam…I really needed to hear this…no pressure
dri Said,
December 29, 2008 @ 2:43 pm
atul rajkar Said,
January 7, 2009 @ 2:34 pm
ha ha ha ha ha………………it was really very funny ………
nano Said,
January 20, 2009 @ 6:00 pm
i realy like it
mhn Said,
February 3, 2009 @ 12:02 pm
nice one dude
{[( 80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read. )]}
this WAS DA BEST OF ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ganpat Said,
February 11, 2009 @ 1:12 pm
not nice………………[:(]
expected more……………….
KSU student Said,
February 11, 2009 @ 6:03 pm
LOL!! true!…. and VERY funny
rihana Said,
February 20, 2009 @ 5:39 am
verrrry
INTRESTING!
RIHANA Said,
February 20, 2009 @ 5:41 am
VERRRRY
INTRESTING!
sumit Said,
March 28, 2009 @ 3:29 pm
all the quotes were damn funny
They considerably lowered doown my exam fear and pressures, as i am going to give my exams day after tomorrow.
Thanx
Ali Shaz (Luclnow) Said,
March 31, 2009 @ 6:20 am
Sorry but its NOT so kewl… still in search for more funny quotes.
megha Said,
April 9, 2009 @ 10:26 am
LOL..!!
……suits me……
Pagla Said,
April 12, 2009 @ 12:09 pm
Jotil Mama..!
Nattz Said,
April 16, 2009 @ 10:08 am
lolxxxx!…hmmm…quite funny!
Pragnesh Said,
April 19, 2009 @ 4:01 am
They were fantabulous !! Enjoyed thoroughly ..
it made my mind fresh .. hehehe !! anyways keep rockin ..
meow Said,
April 22, 2009 @ 6:41 pm
nawt so funny! =[
Resh Said,
April 26, 2009 @ 3:05 pm
the 80% one is way funny n true!
shaista Said,
April 28, 2009 @ 8:15 am
true: I am happy that there are many who think like me. hehe
vijaya Said,
April 29, 2009 @ 8:45 am
wow good job very funnyyyyyyy
taLAL Said,
May 2, 2009 @ 9:57 am
IM LOVIN IT
Sarang Said,
May 3, 2009 @ 2:12 pm
everysingle one of all these quotes on the site are 100% TRUE
and tats what we find funny!!!!
isha Said,
May 6, 2009 @ 10:29 am
mast tha yaar…n very true..especialy d 1…80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read.
Suhas Said,
May 8, 2009 @ 11:48 am
chala bagundi… shabash ra..
Renu Said,
May 12, 2009 @ 2:19 pm
all qoutes are awesome……n i totally agree with these quotes..
sani Said,
May 18, 2009 @ 10:20 am
mast
sani Said,
May 21, 2009 @ 7:33 am
wow
Amit podddar Said,
May 22, 2009 @ 6:23 am
acha hai…….
mike Said,
September 14, 2010 @ 1:33 pm
nice quotes……………..
disha karamchandani Said,
September 24, 2010 @ 9:56 am
great collection…….though dey r funny quotes but sum of dem r actually d facts spcly d 80% one….
apurv Said,
September 25, 2010 @ 10:12 am
bull crap all the quotes are just so boring
ani Said,
September 25, 2010 @ 4:36 pm
it rooks man
Aamir Said,
September 26, 2010 @ 6:02 pm
verry funnny ///
bhout hi aallllla
saya Said,
October 2, 2010 @ 10:28 am
awesum quotes……it helps u in drivin away ur xam fear!!…
khubaib Said,
October 7, 2010 @ 11:38 am
its rocking
really very funny
mitasha Said,
October 8, 2010 @ 1:19 pm
very very funny!!!!!!!!:))))))))
MMZ Said,
October 12, 2010 @ 6:06 am
hmm …………..nice !!!
yog...... Said,
October 22, 2010 @ 4:20 am
they are funnny but they reallly mean alotttt…
nelz Said,
October 26, 2010 @ 9:08 am
luv em all….especialy the first one.
sathya prakash roy Said,
October 29, 2010 @ 7:42 am
superb collctn f quotez..!!
Sandeed Mizan Said,
November 8, 2010 @ 12:29 pm
That is soo funny lolololololol!!!!
ramin Said,
November 18, 2010 @ 4:30 am
i really admire!
sastika Said,
November 20, 2010 @ 9:36 am
hahahhavery very funny”
Pavi$ Said,
November 20, 2010 @ 8:12 pm
Awesome Quotes……!!!!
subh Said,
January 10, 2011 @ 6:40 am
i love ist preson who comment on this
tanzil Said,
January 12, 2011 @ 8:12 am
80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read.. . .this is suuuuperbbb!!!!!!!!!
ayush Said,
January 22, 2011 @ 8:24 am
hahahahaha…………!
cannot resist laughter!:D
nishtha sinha Said,
January 23, 2011 @ 5:42 am
om shanti om dialouge student style
itne shidat se mene pass hone ki koshish ki he
ki har teacher ne mujhe marks na dene ki sazish ki hai
kehte hai ki agar tum kisi subject mein sach mein pass hona chate ho to puri kanyat tumhe usme pass karane mein lag jati hai
yeh exams bhi hamari hindi filmon ki tarah hoti hai … ant mein sab kuch thik ho jata hai
aur agar nahin hota toh exam abhi khatam nahi hoi
supplemnetry abhi baki hai mere dost …. 35 marks “
Parvin Said,
March 16, 2011 @ 11:30 am
thats so funnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
tp Said,
March 18, 2011 @ 6:14 am
hiiii frnzz lets cheat the examinar
atul raina Said,
March 18, 2011 @ 10:16 am
nice one
merchant Said,
March 19, 2011 @ 7:24 am
dis ish rocks…. U da best
Bindaas Lover Boy Said,
March 22, 2011 @ 8:08 am
R’ly vRy fuNnY
:):
Gayathri Said,
March 23, 2011 @ 5:38 am
TRUE… REALLY TRUE….(from my experience)
Muhammad ali akram Said,
March 23, 2011 @ 4:00 pm
very interesting quotes. i love them and i share them with my STUDENTS.
kanika bisht Said,
March 26, 2011 @ 7:30 am
not so gud,…:P….bekar se…:P..tme wasteage..:P
kanika bisht Said,
March 26, 2011 @ 7:30 am
its very boring isse badiya to me banalu..:P…ha ha…..bekar hai ak dum dum qoutes
aditi Said,
April 9, 2011 @ 4:16 pm
nice !!!!!!!!!!!! i lyke it!!!
ranjit Said,
April 11, 2011 @ 10:03 pm
owsamm all the thoughts , i cnt stop my louging…
vasu Said,
April 16, 2011 @ 9:17 am
mast hai yaar…………lolzzzzz……
abhijit Said,
April 18, 2011 @ 6:59 am
nice …..
debjani das roy Said,
April 18, 2011 @ 2:30 pm
funny
reza Said,
April 18, 2011 @ 10:09 pm
really funny. Thanx
Prince chauhan Said,
April 19, 2011 @ 11:48 am
hahahaha so funny yaar.
ananda Said,
April 20, 2011 @ 5:06 pm
Awesome Qoutes. love it
NITIN VERMA Said,
April 22, 2011 @ 9:19 am
80% quote is very near to real happening
syed Ashraf Said,
April 24, 2011 @ 7:49 pm
nyc n funny spclly 80% final exmzzzzzz…:D
syed Ashraf Said,
April 24, 2011 @ 7:51 pm
nyc 1 nishtha ..:)
shaienese Said,
May 1, 2011 @ 12:10 pm
still am stressed !!
maybe am stupid thats y…wait a minute am i telling myself stupid…come on! am not its the examiners who are stupid they dont understand your answers and you are the one to fail ! O.o
hassan jaff Said,
May 1, 2011 @ 12:39 pm
bingoo00o0o0o0o0o0oo00o;-)
vivek nandi Said,
May 1, 2011 @ 12:41 pm
its good but…….
Arpit Said,
May 2, 2011 @ 3:30 pm
very funny
Mahaley Said,
May 3, 2011 @ 9:35 am
This has made my day. I wish all ptsonigs were this good.
Pallavi Gupta Said,
May 12, 2011 @ 6:57 am
Very Funny….
SUVASIS TIRRUWA Said,
May 13, 2011 @ 4:07 pm
Wow U.S is such a cool country degree on hamburger if i was in U.S i would do degree on “CHAPATI” Indian bread or lassi or mela or suhagraat bhar wrestling
Ashish Said,
May 16, 2011 @ 7:03 am
haha NICe quotes…..Lyk ITTT
fasal Said,
May 17, 2011 @ 5:25 am
hhhhhaaaaaaaaa
tehreem fatima Said,
May 17, 2011 @ 2:49 pm
hahahahahaha……………….aala fit man>>>>>>>>
lolzzzzzzzzzz the 80% of ur exam………….. was a v.gudddddddd
tehreem fatima Said,
May 17, 2011 @ 2:51 pm
@ nishta sina u rock buddy!
Aparajita Said,
May 21, 2011 @ 5:14 pm
its really nice..
aaron leonart bhutia Said,
May 23, 2011 @ 9:19 am
he he he..realy damn funny…kep it up crazy headzzzz…zzz…
akshay Said,
May 30, 2011 @ 4:17 pm
wonderful
shankar Said,
May 31, 2011 @ 6:48 am
funny and at the same time reality as well.
Abhishek Said,
May 31, 2011 @ 9:13 am
these are facts not the funny quotes and one should seriously think about it…
divya sharma Said,
May 31, 2011 @ 1:25 pm
ha ha ha ha veeeeeeeerrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy funny!
divya Said,
May 31, 2011 @ 1:53 pm
he he he he ha ha ha ha ha ha ha vvvvveeeeerrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyy fuuuuuuuuuunny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
samx Said,
June 6, 2011 @ 1:12 pm
awwww…..these are … the funniest………….heheheh
<3 ^_^
ronak jain Said,
June 8, 2011 @ 9:14 am
ha ha ha so fuunnyyyyyy it help i decreasing your fear………<3<3<3 ?animTED1?
aastha Said,
June 15, 2011 @ 7:57 am
quite good quotes ;D
preksha jain Said,
June 18, 2011 @ 8:58 am
they are really funny…
enas Said,
June 27, 2011 @ 8:44 am
perfect i just believe it after my exam today
sai Said,
June 29, 2011 @ 2:59 pm
supper all the quotes r
jagruti Said,
July 1, 2011 @ 10:31 am
hehehehehe luvd it here’s a thing i m preparing a presentation on v r brilliants-v only study previous night of exams ur quotes were real helpful 2 me thnx
koi tou hai !! Said,
July 6, 2011 @ 3:37 pm
these are soo true !! Its like some student wrote some of them !
ayepol Said,
July 7, 2011 @ 6:17 am
super like this page ..heheh
Math Said,
July 7, 2011 @ 5:04 pm
i Can’t stop laughing. Its very funny !
chandamakshu Said,
July 8, 2011 @ 4:09 am
its so funnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
rinu Said,
July 8, 2011 @ 8:55 am
superb yaar
vikash Said,
July 11, 2011 @ 1:14 pm
very funny
))))))))))))))))))))
haris Said,
July 21, 2011 @ 12:42 pm
oll of dis r tru for da student’s philosophy
especially for those r not gifted. . in exam!
Ashish Said,
July 31, 2011 @ 2:44 am
he he he.. its toO fuNNy.. specially “80% of final…”… hahahahhahah_ i cant stop my laughing..
sadia Said,
August 16, 2011 @ 3:53 pm
nice quotes but search 4 more..
ayesha maqsood Said,
August 17, 2011 @ 3:04 pm
great i enjoyy…..one of the things that really make u laugh in the hectic routine of college and the examms………niccccce
sd Said,
August 30, 2011 @ 6:01 am
non cannot understand
Quentin Semler Said,
September 3, 2011 @ 10:10 pm
Love these quotes as I have my self a website with quotes about life. Thought it would be wise to share my favorite quote: “It’s the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what’s right.” – Peter Parker
kausambi biswas Said,
September 4, 2011 @ 2:40 pm
hahaa… damn funny truths!! ^_^
Appiagyei M. Said,
September 5, 2011 @ 12:20 am
Examinations are rily funny
Tanvi Gupta Said,
September 8, 2011 @ 2:37 pm
HAHAHA………….SO FUNNY
I CANNOT RESIST MYSELF TO READ & LAUGH ON THESE FUNNY JOKES………..
ONE FROM ME………………………………………….
BOOKS R BEWAFA RAAT KO PADHO SUBHA TAK SAB SAPHA, AUR NA PADHO TO SAZA.
sagar Said,
September 9, 2011 @ 4:40 pm
VERY VERY FUNNY
shashi dayarathne Said,
September 14, 2011 @ 1:59 pm
reallyyyy cool the Quotes are 100% trueeeee